The last line from Mary Oliver’s poem “The Summer Day” always makes my heart skip a beat, like a wise elder asking you the quintessential question that has the power to change your whole life if you allow it.
Around the end of this past February, I knew it was time to make a change, and not just a change-my-job or change-my-haircut kind of change, but a true life-altering, get-rid-of-your-stuff, move-across-the-country kind of upheaval of everything I knew and loved. At times I told myself ‘You must be crazy to give this all up’. But I did it because I felt there was more out there for me, if only I could trust the guidance of my deep wellspring of intuition.
It takes a lot of courage to listen and trust the wisdom of our intuition, because it doesn’t speak in words, but in hunches and feelings. It can also feel heartbreaking to follow your intuition as it leads you down your path, because that also means leaving people and places that you love behind just to follow a “feeling”. I wish my intuition would send me clearly written emails saying “Hey, do this” or “move here” or “you should take that job”. But instead I have to learn the fine art of listening to and following where my intuition wants me to go, and right now it wants me to be back home in New Hampshire. Forget what everybody else says and does. Forget if all the cool young people are packing up and moving out west. The one thing I’ve learned through this whole experience is all that really matters is where I want to be and what I want to do with my life. There may be loss and deep grievances along the way, but I believe there are also blessings and miracles to be had as well.
Right now I need to live amongst trees and birds and summer rain and wide open spaces. A few days ago my parents and I went out hiking with one of the neighbors in Northwood Meadows.
These are exactly the kind of views I need for my health and happiness, and ultimately for the vitality of my art. Open fields, endless skies, wind, bird songs, the sense of limitless potential, my spirit soaring among the clouds. I really don’t know what I’ll be doing here besides weaving and drawing and painting, and maybe even taking a dance or music class. But I can say, it feels like the next right step, and that’s all I need to have faith in.
Spring will be here soon, in fact the snow that carpeted the yard is almost all melted. And the one thing that Spring always brings is new growth, new beginnings, new adventures, new everything. Change is constant in this life, so whether you’re like me and you shipped all of your most beloved possessions across the country, or you’re stuck in an unhappy situation waiting for that calling, listen closely for that little voice of wisdom. It’s barely above a whisper, but if you leave your heart open and your brain chatter off, you just might hear it’s deep wisdom and simple desire to bring happiness to your life.